CHAPTER #8:

I didn’t really know how I was feeling. Seriously, no.  I was just sure that when Justin was with me I felt like if I were in heaven. All the problems got apart. He was so friendly with me. And I loved that. Thinking and thinking and thinking, I got asleep. I dreamt, and yeah, something very real…

˜ …DREAMING… ˜

I was sleeping, when somebody was near me and telling me to wake up. The voice was familiar, but I didn’t really wanna stand up…

- Me: Mom…just 5 minutes more…- said still with the eyes closed and trying to get asleep.

- xxx: I’m not your mom, sweet.- said a male voice.

- Me: Whoever you are…leave me sleep, please.-I said reluctantly.

- xxx: Oh my god! Taylor Lautner is in your door right now.

I just heard “Taylor Lautner” “your door” “now”. I just opened my eyes very quickly & jumped off the bed. I went running to the door, I opened it and I looked everywhere. It wasn’t anybody there. Wait… somebody started to laugh so hard. That voice…

- Me: JUUSTIIIIIIN!!- I yelled and everywhere was my voice with echo.

- Justin: MEE! - said funny.-  Hahahaha. I knew you were going to do that.

I just went slowly to the bed (where he was). I smiled falsely and I slowly took my pillow and started to hit him (not hard).

- Justin: You wanna war? You’ll have ;)- said while taking me and putting me in the bed.

He started to tickle me. I couldn’t resist to that. I tousled him. O_O He was even sexier. XD. We stopped and he was over me. He came nearer and suddenly… I saw that in Justin’s t-shirt were two red points…I stared at those points… when suddenly; I noticed that someone was going to shoot him. I was going to pull him, but in a blink of an eye… BANG! BANG!. Justin looked at me for the last time and fell off the bed. I couldn’t just believe what had happened. My eyes were totally watery. I got off the bed and called Justin…

- Me: J-J-JUSTIN!! PLEASE, NO..JUSTIN! DON’T! ... PLEASE .. HELP!!HELP!!! JUSTIN…SWEETIE… NOO… DON’T GO..-I was totally desperate, sad and my heart was beating so so fast- Y-YO-YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME! NOOOOOOOOO!!! PLEASEEE… WHYY?? YOU CAN’T GOO RIGHT NOOOWWW!! NOO!! PLZ- sound of crying- I…I…I…I…- I couldn’t even tell a word, he was bleeding so much- I ..I L…I LOVE YOU..I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, JUSTIN!! PLEASE… DON’T GOOO!!! I NEED YOU BY MY SIDE!!! JUSTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!!!

˜ …END OF THE DREAM… ˜

Next morning, I woke up and sat really quickly. My heart was pumping hard. I was totally sweaty. I was with a pale face. The dream I had had was really weird, and I started to cry. I was telling my mind: “It was only just a dream. It was only just a dream. O.O” I cried, and cried and cried. I looked at the clock: 10.43 am. I had a shower. It calmed me down. I put on a short denim skirt and a black top. I put my shoes on really quickly and went to Justin’s house. I knocked the door. I was counting the seconds. I was like “Come on. Come on. Come on!!”… Somebody was removing the bolt… not quickly, but SLOWLY. Like “GOD!” . Then, Pattie opened the door.

- Pattie: Hey Megan J did you wanna anything, hun? - said smiling.

She quickly changed the face expression. She looked at me worried.

- Pattie: What’s wrong? – said caressing my hair- why are you sad?- said trying to me to tell.

- Me: Hmm..Is Justin at home? - I said holding back the tears.

- Pattie: Yes, of course. He’s in his bedroom.

I just didn’t tell anything and I ran upstairs. I opened the door and there was Justin, with his cell phone lay in the bed. I started to cry. Not by sadness, but by the fright I had taken. I closed the door.

- Me: J…Jus…-said quietly.

He looked at me. He absolutely changed his face. He was worried. He jumped off the bed and came near me. He hugged me so tightly.

- Justin: Megan?! What happens?- said really worried, still hugging me and caressing my hair.

- Me: I..YOU JUST.. AND TH..AND THEN…-I cried and cried, but couldn’t tell a miserable word.

- Justin:  Shhh… calm down, calm down hun… - said wiping my tears.

We sat down on his bed and I calmed down.

- Me: *taking a deep breath* Well, I’ve had a really bad dream, and first, I thought it was real. We were in my house, you woke me… I didn’t wanna, and then we laughed coz you made me a joke… but when we were smiling and laughing.. we were going to..-I shut up- umm… and then suddenly, YOU GOT SHOT.  O_O- said nervous.

- Justin: Hun, it was a dream…that isn’t gonna happen- a little smile- okay?.

- Me: Yea… -_-… promise?- I looked at his eyes-.

- Justin: Of course. I promise. I ain’t gonna let my best friend alone ;)- said.

- Me: Awwwwh- I hugged him damn tightly. And I kissed him like hundreds of times in his cheek- thank you, Jus  :’) .

He winked his eye. While I was in his arms, I don’t know, I just had chills through my body every second. I just felt safe with Justin by my side. I just loved how he smelled. I loved his hugs so much, too. We separated a bit, he stared at my eyes and I stared at hiss. He had really beautiful eyes. Caramel-colored intense eyes that sometimes said more than his mood.  And my eyes went just to his lips. They were slowly wetting. I could see his tongue doing that. *-* “Control, Megan, control. But.. how the fuck I do that? ;(“. Suddenly, Justin noticed that I was looking at his lips and laughed. My cheeks flushed a bit. It wasn’t my intention… I thought… Suddenly, I heard steps. Yeah, and they were of high heels.

And immediately, a really tall brunette girl entered. She was 18 years old, at least, but she dressed like she was older. She looked at me with a nasty face and she stood by.

- xxx: My love :D I missed you so muchhh ;))- she made a gesture of attracting him.

Justin stood up and went next to her.

- Justin: Selena, this is-

He didn’t even finish, coz that Selena was just eating completely his mouth. I think, Justin did not try to stop. I was really uncomfortable, I had a really huge throat tightening. All the beautiful butterflies I was feeling while I was with him, were gone. All of them.  I felt a big empty inside of me. “But... why? Why do I feel that horrible things?” I didn’t know If I were jealous, sad… I had no idea in that moment what to feel. The only thing I knew was that I hadn’t got anything to do there. I stood up. They continued in their world, like If I were invisible or something like that. I opened the door and left. I ran downstairs and Pattie got shocked. I entered my house and ran upstairs. I lay on my bed and continued crying. And I wondered the same questions all the time: “Why am I sad?” “What’s this feeling?” “I’m starting to love Justin?” “Am I falling in love?” . I didn’t really know. I had a mess in my head in that moment. I tried to get Justin off of my head, but I couldn’t. I just imagined Selena still kissing him, and I got worse. I really started to get angry. Well…Was I jealous? I didn’t know neither. I just knew that I wanted Justin to stay with me and not with her. Thinking: I wanna Justin by my side, if only, I could feel that warm and fully lips that drives me crazy…if only, I could feel protected next to him…L. Wait…what am I saying?? I-I-I just know him by days, and I already love him? Impossible! No!  . I’ve to get him off of my mind... but... I can’t... ;((... why??.

I just stayed all the morning and the afternoon in my bed thinking and crying. Suddenly, I decided to look the clock: 5.30 pm. Wow. 2 seconds after, my cell phone rang.

 ˜ CONVERSATION BY THE PHONE ˜

- Me: Yeah?

- xxx: Megan?? Hun, I’m Elena!

- Me: Oh, Elena, hey hun! How are you? J.

- Elena: -said very nervous- Hun, not now… -she started to talk with the rest of the girls around her- girls, should I tell her that?

I heard some girls saying: Yeah, she has to know it. And other girls: No, she won’t  put up with it.

- Elena: Hmm…ummm… Megan, I’ve to tell you something, but I don’t know how… hmmm…

- Me: Elena, you’re scaring me! Just tell me!- said anxious.

- Elena: B-but… I…

- Me: ELENA, I’LL GET ANGRY IF YOU DON’T TELL ME THAT FUCKING IMPORTANT THING RIGHT NOW. JUST TELL ME!- I yelled.

- Elena: Okay, yesterday, we went to that disco we always go, you know? And well, suddenly, we went to the reserved area.. and.. your bf was kissing and making out with a girl…and well…

- Me: …O_O…

- Elena: Megan?! Are you still there?

- Me: Yeah- with a scraped voice- thanks for telling me Elena. We’ll talk in another moment…

- Elena: Okay, by-

˜ END OF CONVERSATION ˜

I just threw my cell phone anywhere. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. I was totally destroyed: I was starting to feel something big by my best friend and my boy friend was cheating on me. I just felt: useless, stupid, jerk… everything I hadn’t felt before. I just needed somebody by my side to talk; that listened to me. When suddenly, my cell phone rang again. I supposed that It was Elena again.

˜ CONVERSATION BY THE PHONE ˜

- Me: Elena, I told you that we’ll talk in another moment. I don’t wanna talk with anybody right now…- I said reluctantly.

- xxx: First, I’m not Elena, and second, don’t you wanna talk with me neither?- said a male voice.

- Me: Oh, Chaz. Well, I didn’t know you were.-I tried not to sound sad.

- Chaz: Well, I wondered… wait… are you okay?- said with a worrying voice- Are you crying?

- Me: Hmm…I…- I started to cry- Chaz…

- Chaz: Okay, I’ll be in your house in 5 minutes, do you wanna?- said with a animating voice.

- Me: I don’t wanna bother you…- I said shy.

- Chaz: Naah, you don’t bother anybody ,sweet, okay?

- Me: Alright… thanks- I calmed down a bit.

˜ END OF CONVERSATION ˜

TO BE CONTINUED…